Tales from an eternal gypsy who believes anything can happen

If Friday is the end of the world…

mayan-calendar

…what would you do? Who would you spend it with? What are the things you’ve always fantasized about but never had the guts to pursue? The blogosphere is already populated with posts about touchy feely things like making amends with old friends or estranged family members; listing all the things in life to be grateful for (minus this whole apocalypse thing); recounting some of life’s most precious moments.

I say fuck it. It’s a really nice sentiment, don’t get me wrong, but let’s talk about all the wild, over-indulgent and extravagant things we’d do if it were really our last days on earth. It’s much more fun, don’t you think? All those things you never said, all those people you wish you’d shagged, all the times you wanted to tell your boss to stuff it. Here’s my list of things I’d do if Friday is the end of the world

Do a few lines of coke. I’ve never touched the stuff and an apocalypse seems like an appropriate time to experiment with drugs.

Put out a sex tape.

Tell the hostesses at Rodney’s to go fuck themselves when they tell me it’s a 90 minute wait, should I put you on the list?

Find a bartender in Vancouver who can properly prepare absinthe and throw back a few snifters.

Watch this film for the 1,000th time.

Buy one of these.

Ride my bike down Nelson Street bare ass naked with only a toque and mukluks.

Thank songwriters like Scott Weiland, Clarence Greenwood, Stevie Wonder, Paul McCartney, Al Green, Robert Plant, Jeff Buckley, Bonnie Raitt, Leslie Feist, Emily Haines, and Dallas Green for inspiring me to my core.

DANCE.

Order the oldest bottle of wine from Cioppino’s cellar and polish it off whilst eating a triple portion of gnocchi covered in marinara sauce and parmesan cheese with tiramisu on the side.

Purchase and wear this KAUFMANFRANCO frock (before consuming the aforementioned meal) with these pink pumps by Jimmy Choo.

Kiss each and every one of you for reading my blog.

Bathe in a bathtub of Dom Perignon with my husband as the lights go out.

I better get going if I’m to complete the above list in time for rapture! What would you do if Friday was your last day on earth?

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